Worst Movie of 2014: A Million Ways to Die in the West

   

     Westerns in the 21st century shouldn't be made if they're going to be this homogenized. A lack of racist and slavery jokes. Over explaining jokes.  Now, this is not say that, I'm inquiring this film to reach the potential of Mel Brooks's Blazing Saddles, but it fails at all of the general principles of how to do a proper western comedy well, let alone any live-action comedy. It's snarky, uninspired & unfunny. It's should obvious to anyone that Seth McFarlane wasn't made for this role. Being a highly accomplished voice actor isn't simple, same for physical acting. You notice, from the get-go, McFarlane isn't right for this role because he's so tight for the whole movie. Same goes for when he attempts to, needlessly, explain a joke to the audience like weren't not supposed to understand the comedy he's trying to establish here. Some jokes that you'd expect might be a hit (For example, a meaningless cameo from Back to the Future's Doc Brown) fall flat because there's no confidence in the material being provided. Sadly, for what it's worth, makes sense that this has to be told through a simpleton over and over again. Other than Charlize Theron and Jamie Foxx, there was hardly a redeeming soul to save this travesty. Not even Neil Patrick Harris or Sarah Sliverman could save this from movie dysentery.

     In closing, I was considering a runner-up for this category. I didn't even bother looking for a contender as an honorable mention in futility in 2014. Blame it on me for seeing too many good films to care about seeing any other bad ones.

Best in Movies 2014: 10-6

10) Birdman

     
      Edward Norton needed this film. Yes, Michael Keaton kills it as a once prominent actor who settles into the world of Broadway, but consider Norton to be back among the frame of versatile actors to lose what he had and regain it. Norton was, simply, magnificent as rival of sorts to Keaton's Riggan Thomson. It was like, whose ego could beat-up whose more, as far as dominance goes. Norton was classic Norton in this movie. Birdman sort of plays to that trope rather brilliantly, as Keaton’s Riggan leaves the cluttered world of Hollywood for something more subtle, like plays. Of course, when you leave a character that many identify with, you're never able to leave that identity that people force you to be in. Anytime, Riggan's tried to leave his successful past, he'd be haunted by it, repeatedly. If I had to define Birdman's plot: A lot of people dealing with tons of insecurities. 

       Props, once again, to the supporting cast, particularly, Emma Stone and her plethora of facial muscle; and, the superb direction by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu for relying one whole shot for the entire film. It’s a gimmicky concept to use, but since a portion of the film takes place in a theater, it makes sense, literally and metaphorically. If this was a movie built on the one-shot construct, yet had little depth, this might just be a decent film. Luckily, it's more than that.

   

9) Top Five

     
       I'm a little upset at myself for not having an official review of Top Five; too many work obligations and late nights, so I was never able to provide a proper review for this film, so, technically, this is my review. Without question, this is easily Chris Rock's best film, ever. Not even joking. Rock could've done Hammy the Bear and I would've been cool with it. Alas, despite his incredible stand-up routines, he's always struggled to translate that success into memorable roles at the Box Office. A simple reason as to why this film work, was because it allowed Rock to be vulnerable. Before, he'd be some caricature attempting comedy. It wasn't that he didn't try, he did. It just wasn't funny. Besides Pootie Tang, a rather ridiculous film, he doesn't do a lot of good comedies. 

      Top Five works for not relying on tired gimmicks. What makes this work, is that it doesn't have to try hard to be a competent comedy. It allows the dialogue and story to do its work without telling us what's going on. The audience can figure out what's funny and/or what isn't funny. Also, all of the cameos work and even some of them have importance to the story. Rosario Dawson works as the double agent film critic, who follows Andre Allen (Rock) for most of the film. JB Smoove is dope as Allen's assistant. Before this film came out during December, 22 Jump Street & Neighbors (which I thought was OK, at best) held reign as the best comedy of 2014.  22 Jump Street was cool for making fun of sequels and how hard it is to top a predecessor. While Neighbors held weight, for some, was it being a frat-boy comedy. Top Five is just a much a deeper movie than those two. Add that it has more replay value in the long run, it’s hard not to get tired of it. 

      Now, as for my Top Five? Mine’s more unorthodox than others, so I went in a different direction from most who have their favorite rappers, rockers, jazz, etc. I went towards film composers, because I grew up loving film scores at an early age. This is my list, including an honorable mention:                                     

Top 5 film composers: 1) Hans Zimmer 2) Jerry Goldsmith 3) John Williams 4) Ennio Morricone 5) Eliott Goldenthal HM: Shirley Walker
— Cinematic Wanderer (@HALLS24) December 28, 2014

8) Captain America 2

      Just as shocking as my ranking of The Winter Soldier, I almost didn't see it in theaters back in May right before Amazing Spider-Man 2 was premiering nationwide. Initially, I was going to see it in April, albeit, work nights and personal matters kept me from seeing it earlier than I should have. Taking over from director Joe Johnson, The Russo Brothers did a lot to intertwine spy thriller & action-adventure, relate it to current times (i.e. War on Terror, Surveillance, etc) & come away with a fantastic film that has a different feel from other comic book films. It's also a well-balanced film, which allows for a lot of action, plot, character development and shocking twists bound to follow. This could've been another run-of-the-mill action event that would've been improved and tweaked from The First Avenger, yet, it still would've been good, just not an 8th place film for 2014. Besides, who've thought Robert Redford would be in a movie such as this playing a very important villain whose compromises S.H.I.E.L.D as a sleeper cell for Hydra. That man has helmed some of the most important movies for all-time (The President's Men, The Natural, and so on). Chris Evans, gradually, improved as Steve Rogers here. Learning from Joss Whedon and his role from the first film sort of is an evolution for a man who was once Johnny Storm. Scarlett Johansson grew here, too. I'm not saying she became a better actress because of the Marvel property or this movie, let's get that straight. We, as an audience, got the opportunity to see her character's growth as a crucial conduit to the Captain America/Avengers series narrative. She wasn't good in Iron Man 2 (more a fault of the film than her, to be fair), but was better served in the first Avengers film, using her interrogative skills to her benefit, when baiting Loki to confess on any possible intelligence. Unrelated to this list, I don't want to see a Black Widow film. We'll just have to rely on her backstory via dialogue. Take it or leave. A lot of people were so well-developed here, you hardly cared, because the movie flowed. Anthony Mackie (Falcon), Sebastian Shaw (Winter Soldier), Samuel Jackson (Nick Fury) were all magnificent. As the series turns to 2016’s Civil War, after Age of Ultron & Ant-Man, we can only ponder where things go from here.

7) Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

     I really struggled to rank this one properly when I planned out this list of films for 2014. Mind y'all, this Dawn was an amazingly, epic movie. But, when the rest of the top-5 spoils you to submission, it's hard to find a place for this and Captain America 2. Unfortunately, I didn't see this in theaters when I had the opportunity too. I just didn't have the context of Rise of the Planet of the Apes during the month of June. So, when I planned out Christmas day, I decided to do a double feature of both films, before I ran out of time for it. What makes this sequel superior to its predecessor, it revels in being a story about the Apes than the humans. Also, it's a better movie, if you focus on the marketed beings here. Developing the Ape characters, as a whole, makes this franchise a better film than the originals were, when they relied on more practicalities. A big reason why past films probably weren't good, WAS, well, too much focus on one human character interacting with humans dressed as apes. It took the mystique away from allowing the idea of "man vs ape" away, since, you saw the imperfections. Andy Serkis, Toby Kebbell, Judy Greer and others used motion capture to create the movement of the Apes. Whatever position you stand on the issue of practical effects or computer generated images, you have to applaud the work made here by capturing their movements, vocals and motivations. It add a different layer when it's aided by mocap. So amazing. The story's more multi-layered, compelling characters and an enriching score by Michael Giacchino. Too many other good things to name here, other than, we have to wait a couple more years until movie 3. Ugh. 


6) Selma

     Ava Duvernay is a bad-ass. A damn shame by the Academy Awards for not nominating her for best director or for bowing down to others because Selma wasn't true to Lyndon B. Johnson. She didn't set out to make a movie that'll appeal to masses who wanted another homogenized slave or Civil Rights film that'll sort of skirt away the real problems, she did a movie set out to tell as true a story of the movement.  This is a much needed film for our times, because of the issues going on, right now. Shootings of unarmed black people & the diligent work by protesters bringing to light the tragedies of Mike Brown, Tamir Rice, Ezell Ford, Renisha McBride and others that were shot wrongfully. Selma didn't bullshit its way towards doing another one of these films that'll get a nomination by just being visionary. It proceeded to illustrate black & white relations and how hard it is for us to come together as a society. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., for once, wasn't looked as a "holier than thou" figure here, too. Even the fight for Civil Rights was a hard thing to fight for in America. Hell, still is, to this day. Paramount, Harpo Films (Oprah's film company) & Pathe could've Lee Daniels-ed this project and you'd have another one of these overwrought movies that don't serve black people well and over stylizes black people. David Oyelowo's portrayal of MLK is simply incredible. He doesn't just nail his voice but his intellect, posture & vulnerability. He nailed all of that. Props to Tom Wilkerson for his portrayal of LBJ as he too portrayed him as a flawed figure and, no, Selma was not his idea as some would wrongfully proclaim. The cast is properly well-served here, too; from George Wallace all the way to James Bevel. The sad part about this film, was, it was going to be picked apart by some, because, Ava didn't set out to make another wispy-ass film on civil rights and/or racism. She wanted to make THE story of the movement without being vilified by some who can't handle historical accuracy. She didn't set out to make "Kumbaya My Lord" the movie just to make some feel better, which would simply resolve nothing when it comes to ending racism, intolerance, ignorance, etc. She presented the movie from a practical, reasonable perspective, which is what we all want when discussing this issue. Also, it looks astonishing, thanks to cinematographer Bradford Young. It has a very 1960’s style to portray it for the era it’s in. I didn't want to see it, at first, because 2014 was so goddamn exhausting. I turned down "Dear White People" for that very reason & I might have done the same with this one. Glad I saw it. Take anyone you know to see it, it's that important. Shit, if you’re a Democrat or Republican, see this film. There’s no “side” here, just a rational portrayal of everyone and everything.

Best in Movies 2014: 15-11

15.) Nightcrawler

     Very odd for me to refer to Nightcrawler as the little movie that could, but, in a sense, it is. Made for nearly $9 million dollars, Jake Gyllenhaal put everything into this project in hopes for an Oscar nomination. He was also the first actor to be a part of this film, adding more to the project. Dan Gilroy, who wrote screenplays for Freejack, Two for the Money and Real Steel, stepped into the directing chair as if he did it before. Brother of Tony (Michael Clayton, The Bourne Legacy) & John Gilroy, who is a film editor. Dan was able to bring Jake to a place of nihilism, which is weird, since, he's a first time director, so, watching Gyllenhaal's Lou Bloom exude arrogance or Rene Russo's Nina becoming consumed to Lou's perverted vision for broadcast news, it was something that took me by surprise. Gyllenhaal brought his A game for this movie and the character, Lou Bloom. It's odd that I think that he being in this film is more challenging than some of the other work that I'm accustom to seeing him in. You had other actors like Bill Paxton and Riz Ahmed play the role of spoiler here, and they were both great in their own respects, but I was here for Russo & Gyllenhaal's characters. Both of them were battling different issues. One was trying to stay relevant in network news, while the other was selling desensitized news via video. Worst part for Nina, she has to choose what Lou is selling, because she'll be irrelevant, otherwise. Kinda reminds me of the current state of reporting, really. There's a lot of references of "soul selling" here. I mentioned in my review that I thought this movie should've been a tad short, but I apologize; 2 hours was good enough for this movie.

14.) The Fault in Our Stars

     This just made my list by the slimmest of margins, not that a list should come down to a wild.  I manage to catch Fault in time when prepping it for this list, when I had time to work on this. What impressed me the most, is how the cast treated a disease, such as cancer, as that it wouldn't hinder the lives of Hazel & Augustus. As their characters developed, and as cliched as this sounds, I ended up rooting for them to overcome their illness. Other than Interstellar, this was the closest I was to crying. No Joke. Even though it can make the viewer emotional or dispirited because it hits you hard metaphorically, it does have a way of making you feel fine when the movie attempts comedy to shed away the drama. While, I can't make a relation from the book to film adaptation, because, alas, I haven't read it. If there was a movie that you had to watch that screams YOLO for young and old. Truly, it is the little movie that could, when you beat out the $178 million Edge of Tomorrow and had high female & millennials show up for something like this. Only thing I can say is, good for y’all & this film.

13.) Get On Up

     Had a slight dilemma with this one. First things first, I loved this film and Chadwick Boseman's portrayal as James Brown.  Plotwise, it's filmed out of order to give that "best of James Brown" feel. I didn't mind that it was in this way and it worked for this movie. Preferably, it would've been considerate to allow the story of Brown straightforward. That being said, some biopics do have this tendency of being dull in nature for being so damn linear. I remember watching The King's Speech years ago and I couldn't stay up for that (It was also nighttime & performed my evening job, thus, sleepy). Some struggle to set you in the right mood, others have that right approach to make things interesting. It's a damn shame this was released at the same time as Guardians of the Galaxy on Aug 1st. Sure, it barely made its budget ($30 produced/$32 domestically), but Universal put this one at a bad date, so as people were partying to the ebbs & flows of Galaxy, this one was left alone, period. Chadwick will be in good hands as he'll be among the growing ranks at Marvel Studios as Black Panther, though. Not a total loss for him or his superb acting prowess. 


12.) Edge of Tomorrow

     Before I get into my overview of Edge of Tomorrow, I'm still stunned that young adults managed to steal the shine away from Tom Cruise with The Faults in our Stars during the summer. Maybe folks were sick of effects-driven action flicks or maybe millennials decided for a weekend, it's Shaliene Woodley's time to take Cruise's throne. Then again, Cruise was a Box Office draw during the 90's, not today. It's kind of unfortunate this film didn't get more viewership in theaters. Can’t figure as to why that was, but sucks that it didn’t work out. Having caught it, recently, a lot of people missed out on a joyous spectacle. Besides Cruise, Emily Blunt was wonderful as the action heroine to rival that of her venerable star. Whether she was slicing creatures or teaching Lt. Bill Cage to master the art of death, she served a core purpose towards defeating the Mimics. There were times where it felt, she held everything together and Tom was the supporting character for the movie. Hopefully, I'll see her in more action movies, she really held her own here. Cruise was his usual cocky self here as a PR rep for the Army. Fitting role, really; because, he's never looked vulnerable, character-wise. He wasn't a sympathetic character at first, until, he was able to nail down the "rinse, repeat, death" thing to an art. As he kept losing, his skills, suddenly, improved with every death. I like to think of that as leveling up on the first stage of Devil May Cry (2005 version). Obviously, the selling point, is the "unlimited continues" concept here. The more you die, the easier the opportunities at success. But, just avoid getting a pint of someone's blood, you won't be able to reset the day. I never had the privilege of reading "All You Need is Kill" from Hiroshi Sakurazaka, which was adapted for Tomorrow, I'll have to check it out of curiosity. Still, though, to get beaten by Faults on the weekend of June 6-8, stands as a stunner for 2014. 

11.) Theory of Everything 

      About 40-45 minutes into Theory of Everything, when Stephen Hawking tried to get on those steps and saw his child upstairs, is when I realized, not only will Eddie Redmayne be nominated for best actor when the Oscars come around, but embodies Stephen Hawking in every single way. It was as if, I was seeing the man himself rather than the actor who portrayed the man. More than a love story than a science tale on time & psychics (However, they do play a role in the film) Everything exceeds by allowing us to appreciate the story of Stephen & Jane Hawking’s. Also, some of the subtlety works so well. Jokes, implied sex, etc. It all works here without trying to be another trite biographical film. It's a love story with a lot of added variables in order to tell this story. A lot of credit go to Felicity Jones, as well, for her role. What she can't match in physical acting, she's able to match in acting, since they worked so well together. Rest of the cast is fine, though, save for a few characters, who don’t matter towards the core relationship. They play the role of audience like the rest of us watching the movie. The direction is sharp, focused & solid, throughout.  Director James Marsh should be proud of the work that he achieved here.

Best in Movies 2014: 20-16

20) The Grand Budapest Hotel

     Figured that I'd start this bad boy off with an ode to director Wes Anderson. I had a weird feeling that I was going to run into this film, again as a favorite of the year. Now, this is only the third film that I've watched from Anderson since 2009's Fantastic Mr. Fox, which means, I'll have to see more of his work, in due time; but, I enjoyed this movie a good deal. If Ralph Fiennes wants to do more comedies, he should; he was wonderfully splendid as creepy, self-absorbed Gustav H. The rest of the cast is well-supplemented here to add to the depth of Fiennes character. Many have similar and/or different idiosyncrasies that gave this film more depth. Also, it's a beautiful movie both visually, as well. The Hotel, which has a significant role in the movie, feels like a character in its own right with the mixture of its bright pink exterior and in some instances, interior, too. As typical with a lot of Anderson's films, actors who've been in his movies have cameos here, and they're cool to see. It's like seeing Owen Wilson or Bill Murray in this film, it's like Wes built this "class of" collage for these characters, and they just come into his projects. 

19) Love is Strange  

     
     I'd like to call Love is Strange a random draw of 2014, because, aside from gay marriage angle, I knew nothing else about it. I knew who was in it (well, besides Marisa Tomei), I just didn't know anything else. I saw this movie as the second week of the NFL was wrapping up on Sunday Sept. 14th, so I thought it would be timely if I caught a movie as the weekend was winding down that evening. As I nominate this movie as my 19th favorite of 2014, I have to point its superb direction, solid cinematography, top-notch cast. Of all the highly acclaimed Oscar contenders for 2014, this one will probably be left off, since, it wasn't as high profiled like Birdman. So, I don't have a clear reason as to why it hadn't receive any attention as an awards contender for, at least, the performance of Alfred Molina. Maybe, it was a tad too subtle for some, I guess. For what it's worth, this small production impressed me.

18) Maleficent

     Fairy tales aren't for me. Their overwrought lines with wishes and love only annoy me at the highest level. Now, this isn't me being "that guy" to generate clicks for this little blog site, I've ALWAYS hated that advice from some random jackass telling kids about "true love at first site" or "having true love overcome hatred". Maleficent is a retelling of 1959's Sleeping Beauty, which had a lot of sappy love tropes, back when we weren't as progressive as we are now. Part of the reason why I enjoyed this update as much as I did, was that, rather than make another version of the same thing, the antagonist was more layered than recent adaptations. Maleficent is still the same brooding villain, just more vulnerable in moments here. For example, in the original Sleeping Beauty, Maleficent was upset that she wasn't invited to King Stefan's party, then curses his newborn, Aurora, when she becomes 16, would prick her finger on the spinning wheel of death. The 2014 film is her taking her revenge on Stefan, because he clipped her wings in order to prove his worth to his king; then, Maleficent proceeds towards vengeance against her former friend and curses his daughter......except, later on, has a modicum of sympathy for her goddaughter, especially, when her spell is irreversible. The only way it can be broken is by forgiveness. It's not that the story was groundbreaking or inventive, it added a layer that didn't make her goal so vague. Her goal was meaningful, rather than materialistic, which made the movie even more engaging. Angelina Jolie looks like she had a blast making this character come to life, as much as we enjoyed it with her. I wasn't crazy about the fights scenes, but the overall direction was solid, same for the rest of the production, cast. If I ever planned to write about a surprise of 2014, I'd nominate this one.  

17) 22 Jump Street

     22 Jump Street immediately made me rethink my thoughts on the first movie (I didn't give it a favorable review). I clearly was anticipating something based off the series, but, I just couldn't see that that film was parodying other franchises. Yet, I loved 22 for its well-timed jokes, references and excellent cast. Aside from Jonah Hill, this is Channing Tatum's domain, whether or not, he can transition to be a serious actor (though, I've heard, that he's really good in Foxcatcher), he's a great comedic actor. Part of it is, he's always good at being so one-note, that it doesn't require much for him to do anything else in that area of arts. Kinda sucks that White House Down didn't work, since, he was being.....Channing Tatum in a movie that had an identity crisis. Jillian Bell works here as sort of the insecure college student suspect of Hill & Tatum. And, of course, crazy-ass Peter Stormare was pretty funny as the drug dealer. As of this article, I haven't gone back towards watching 21 Jump Street; however, let's just say that, I'm apologizing to it in advance. I shouldn’t have over thought that film in the first place, anyway.

16) The Drop

     
     Tom Hardy owned this movie. He established himself as an excellent lead with The Drop. Hardy has demonstrated in the past, he can stand toe-to-toe with excellent lead actors. Here, though, he did manage to overshadow the late James Gandolfini. These roles don't seem to intimidate Hardy, nor does acting alongside Gandolfini, either. Now, I don't want y'all to think that my support for this film isn't sorely on the acting of one man. Many of the characters here as compelling, even multi-layered, because it's a movie about people dropping money off various bars throughout Brooklyn. Noomi Rapace is very good here too, albeit, her character wasn't as interesting as her counterparts, but she rarely disappoints. I liked how everyone was always trying to one up each other, expecting that no one was going to get the advantage on anyone. Even the two leads sort of had a sibling rivalry as to who's going to make it out alive before one (or both of them) were to get wacked. I was even impressed by the direction, too. He’s a Belgian director, and whatever information he took on the bourough of Brooklyn, he did an excellent job on capturing the moment. Thoroughly surprised by this movie.